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Thursday, April 1, 2010

An Egg-alitarian Society

Young women take to selling eggs. On a leisurely Sunday, sipping my morning cuppa, this headline grabbed my eyeballs. Selling for as high as 50 grand! Where, when, how, can I too? I was all agog until I finished the entire sentence (Patience is not a virtue that I possess). Women are now selling their own eggs and the moolah depends on their looks an qualifications.

Ok, now I am too old to make a killing vending my eggs. But what a colossal waste of years I spent slogging, stressing and ranting over a job when I could have simply shed my inhibitions and eggs and led a carefree life.

Will people be now shopping for eggs, albeit of a different kind? One egg please, 5.6 ish, fair, convent educated, with an IQ higher than 120. Or can I have a homely egg, with creative inclinations. Imagine a world where eggs are tailor made to perfection and a happily ever after future with a genius of a baby.

So, will marriage soon become an obsolete concept? Something that our future generations will read about in their History books! Men and women won’t be requiring each other for procreation anymore. Wombs are on rent, eggs on sale, so why bother. Let’s observe a two minute silence for all those marriage martyrdom jokes that will wilt away to extinction.

Many will argue, this is yet another milestone towards gender equality and empowerment. If alpha males can sell their sperm, can alpha females be far behind! A woman can make thousands by donating just a single egg. Sperm donors on the other hand are paid much less. But the process entails no risk and is hardly any trouble for the men. They get to watch “stimulating visuals” and do what they have to in a private cabin. Egg donation on the other hand is far more risky. Hormones are injected to increase ovulation and the extraction is invasive. This can lead to medical complications in the future. We women never have it easy. All the good things for us always come with a rider.

Can I have a Megan Fox egg and a Lalit Modi sperm please? What a potent combination of beauty and enterprise. Although I do run the risk of having a daughter with His looks and Her brains.

18 comments:

  1. My lip is zipped coz I cannot submit to laughter :)..

    In this world where Greed is God and Cash is King, everything is on sale, and the word prostituted has replaced the word professional..

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  2. This is hilarious indeed. I like it

    Cheers
    Milan

    http://milanavi.blogspot.com/

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  3. It was very witty and hilarious post. :D
    I'm not selling my eggs no matter what. :P

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  4. Tarun...As long as there are buyers, there will be sellers.

    Milan.. Thanks, will be reading your post

    Nethra: ever wondered the kind of labels each egg can have?

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  5. Witty as ever Purba! I am trying very hard to come with a funny one about Easter and eggs, but can't, damn!
    My favourite bit is the spoof on matrimonials: One egg please, 5.6 ish, fair, convent educated, with an IQ higher than 120. Or can I have a homely egg, with creative inclinations.

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  6. I will differ on this..as long as sellers would be there there would be buyers...

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  7. You can't just sell anything and get away with it. It is a need based market.

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  8. Good post, indeed!! I liked the end - what if his look and her brain...could turn into terrible decision:D.

    I have to agree with Tarun. Not only necessities but needs too are sold in market, not recently but since long back and that's how it probably reached to eggs n sperms.... It's like knowing in advance or can say getting into buyers mind to know what they would buy. No wonder MBAs are in more demand than educators these days:).

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  9. Ah they are! Damn I wasted all those years.

    And glad you liked the post.

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  10. Haha..Hilarious

    Gonna read the previous posts!

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  11. lol! that was indeed a super rib tickler or should i say a womb tickler?! :)

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  12. LOL!!! I remember watching a documentary in one of the local channels on this egg collation. The documentary also had an interview of a couple of donors who had no problems what so ever in depositing an egg month after another. Infact they were upbeat about the moolah they were making through this. This may be boon for some of those married but not so happy couple who have impotency issues.

    the bottom line remains the same. The more we meddle with nature, that much more we need to brace up to face the unknown!

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  13. I tried to get into buyers mind...LOL!!! Attribute specific eggs/sperms - these eggs/sperms will go under special genetic treatment so buyers will exactly get what they want (intelligence, beauty etc.) and of course will cost you more but no risk of "his look and her brain"...xD

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  14. Thank you Magic Eye and Sorcerer..Do keep reading my posts

    Alpesh: A successful venture always stems out of a great idea. So is there a new business proposition in the offing? All you need is a few willing donors. And when you succeed don't forget to thank your teacher.

    Mohan : Imagination and Science knows no bounds. . The world is spending millions to see particles collide, organs are being harvested, sheep cloned .

    Curiosity did not kill the cat, it gave birth to Science.

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  15. Science is the ghost of the dead cat

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  16. And will some one's Research paper be titled ..The Ghost Story.

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  17. The real upside is now we can all have sex purely for the pleasure, and the women can get laid one place, and lay their eggs elsewhere..

    Shute man, once again i am reminded that i was born too early and will miss out on this party too..

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  18. :)

    I knew about wombs on rentals, but eggs on sale! - you have put up the whole subject with such fine humour, I loved reading it.

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